Thursday, Jan. 28 – day 2
Its 6:30 a.m. I called Sadie this morning. She was on her way to school with Debbi Ewing-Shol-Hight, the wife of the court appointed custodial keeper, Donny Hight. Donny Hight & wife Debbie has changed Sadie's school yet again, this time it is mid-year. This makes the 6th or 7th exchange of schools that Donny has initiated himself, while Sadie has been in their care for no apparent reason other than the school Sadie is attending wasnt/isnt convenient. Judge Xollie Duncan will not recognize in court the multiple changes of schools as being unstable for the child. I am not, of course notified of these changes, even though it is required within the court orders. I have to find my daughter of my own resources and accord. Yes, this and many other things are in violation of my side of the court order, but falls conveniently upon deaf ears …as the court hearings are never heard, just passed by. Oh yes there are rulings made but the hearings are not heard. I know your wondering…..huh?
I bought Sadie a cell phone and pay for the services. The cell phone has been a wonderful tool for communication not just for me and Sadie but for them/Donny & Debbi, as well. Donny & Debbi utilized it, embrace it for their own use but resist it when it comes to me communicating with my daughter. The Custodial keepers/Donny & Debbi often control mine and Sadie’s conversations, but that doesn't matter to me as long as I can visit somewhat with my daughter. It is important that “I” can communicate to Sadie that “I” love her. Donny nor Debbi can manipulate my side of the conversation, try as they do. Its important for Sadie to hear my voice say “I love you” to her ears. The cell phone also allows Sadie the freedom to call me and tell me that they/the Custodial keepers/Donny & Debbi have made changes so that I don’t worry, when she/Sadie is late or has a change in plan, otherwise, I would not ever be notified as before I would be left worrying and wondering. It also cuts down a massive confusion in regards to their demands as they/Donny & Debbi often use Sadie as a go between to issue me orders. They/Donny & Debbie know I wont say no to Sadie’s requests. Therefore, it is very useful to their last minute requests to pick Sadie up, buy her the things she needs, or change the drop off point at a last minutes notice or to a different place than that that had been pre-arranged. They/Donny & Debbi are to cowardly and immature to address me themselves, as adults or maybe its because they have guilt issues. Eighter way, the phone has been a wonderful device. Sadie loves having it as she can keep up with her friends current and past. It makes me happy to see her enjoy it.
Sadie seemed to be very excited about the new school changes, even though she’d be leaving behind all of her just made friends to start over again. She said she had homework to do before she went to class, which I thought was odd. Sadie says she has to get up at 4:30-5a.m., now that she has changed schools and ride to school with /Debbi. The long drive into town so early in the morning for school, makes it hard for her to do her homework at night because she is so tired. She usually just goes straight to bed. Debbi is a school teacher at Washington Jr. High, at the school that they/Donny & Debbi just changed Sadie to. Sadie says she arrives at school around 6:30a.m., but yet school doesn't actually start until 8:45 a.m.
Sadie had explained all of this to me, when I asked her about her lunch schedule. Part of her explanation was that she didn't want me to eat lunch with her anymore because it would be to embarrassing to have to explain to everyone who “I” am (her real mother) verses who Debbi actually was/is because Debbi is claiming Sadie as her/Debbi’s daughter for this school year. I thought this to be odd, as I have always eaten lunch with Sadie every Tuesday & Friday, without fail, since Sadie had started pre-school. I wondered if my eating lunch with Sadie at Washington Jr. High was to embarrassing for Sadie or for Debbi, since she/Debbi would be caught in a bold faced lie, which is very indicative of this entire situation. In actuality, I can see where my presents would be disturbing to Debbi, as I have always been apart of PTA for years and have had 3 children before Sadie attend that very school. And YES, Debbi was or has been a history teacher for my other 3 children. I definitely can see where my presents would be disturbing and where someone would have to admit to the truths of this scandalous charade. Sadie has to live with these people and succumb to the peer pressure of her situation therefore, I understand completely. I can see it for its face value contra to the unbelievable cover ups. If Sadie doesnt adhere to their constant pressure then they badger her with nasty quips about me and guilt. All of this is NOT a new revaluation to me, as I have personally befriended Debbi in the past as I have known her personally for years before all of this. Sadie's friends already know me as her mother so this doesn’t make any sense at all but then again, Debbi is a known master of parental alienation and manipulation.
(Explanation)Maybe she/Debbi is trying to make up for the loss of ‘face’ of loosing her own children at the school in which taught and still teaches at when she lost custody of her children. At the time of Debbi’s divorce her ex-husband Mark Sole, said that Debbi was being treated for personality disorders and depression. She became so obsessed about alienating her own children’s father that she actually lost custody of her own children because of it, along with other psychotic behaviors, which forced Mark into filing a restraining order against her/Debbi. Mark had stated in his restraining order that he was in fear for his and his children’s safety. Mark raised the children and Debbi is still fighting to re-insert herself with her own children, for the wrongs she has done…so my presents at that school would have been an embarrassment to her/Debbi and not to my child/Sadie. So for the two of them/Donny & Debbi to hang on to something(Sadie) that doesn’t belong to them thru lies and manipulations is sick. But what does that say about the Judge that allows it to continue to happen. OHhhh no, of course this was never brought out in any of my court hearings because my hearings are NEVER heard…I will get into this as the story goes on, but the hearings were NEVER heard because of a well planned diversion tactic by a Judge and a comrade attorney…You may think Im crazy, but I not. I will explain this all… as the story unfolds. Donny too has had his bough’s with psychiatric hospitals, trying to commit suicide, and counselors. And yet these are the people, Judge Xollie Duncan is allowing who’s to raise my daughter. Yet Judge Xollie Duncan, refuses any information to be allowed in to a hearing, to the extent that she/Judge Xollie Duncan refuses to hear the case altogether. And refuses to recuse even though we ALL grew up together. Interesting….isnt it? WHY? I want you to tell me…as that is my question.
My last visitation with Sadie was on Tuesday before my court hearing on Wednesday, morning at 8 a.m. ……. To be continued….
We (Kate, Bubba, Sadie & myself) were eating at Ci-Ci's Pizza at the time. I was sitting next to Sadie. Kate was directly across from Sadie and Bubba directly across from me. I told her I understood and I did, far more that she realized. Sadie really hadn't said two words to me this entire time other that this explanation. Most of her conversation was directed to her siblings. My heart sank in my chest at her request. But if this was what is necessary, then so be it. It was a request that I would adhere to. A friend from church reminded me of the story in the Bible about King Solomon and the Baby. For those who may not know the story…the readers digest version…
One day two women brought a baby to King Solomon. Each woman said the baby was her child. King Solomon said, "Cut the baby in half and give half of the baby to each woman." (Of course, he didn't really intend to kill the baby. It was just a test.) "NO!" screamed the real mother, "Give her the baby. Do not kill him." Then King Solomon knew who the real mother was because of the way she loved the baby. He gave the baby to its real mother.
At that moment I realized just how unimportant I am and confused Sadie is. Even though I have been at beacon call to meet her needs and Donny & Debbi’s relentless demands and manipulations of me outside of my court ordered obligations. They/Donny & Debbi, shame me in public and to my children as to being a bad parent if I dont jump every time they/Donny & Debbi holler Toad. Believe me when they say…Toad… I DO jump. I have never shirked my visits or my responsibilities to Sadie or my other children regardless. I have said nothing in order to keep the confusion down. I have done whatever I can within the boundaries of all the restrictions put upon me trying to show this child how much I DO love her and assure her that I am there for her. I want so desperately to be her mother and to raise her. I AM these children’s mother and circumstances has been the culprit and the demise of my/our family not my lack of parental care of her or them. I did NOT give Sadie away, nor did I loose her because of any malice towards her. Sadie was taken from me under a pretense of deliberate preposterous lies conjured by Donny Hight! I'm NOT a bad parent! There are NO records of proof or allegations to support any wrong doings on my part because there ISN'T any. It is just that damned simple! A malicious Judge with a biased attitude and an association with my ex-husband/Donny, which as my story unfolds I will explain in detail. I Challenge anyone to investigate this......please be my guest, I beg you to investigate this and my story.
I kept my telephone conversation light and short with Sadie as our conversation was being monitored and guided by Debbi, as Debbi kept interjecting questions for Sadie to ask me...so I ended the conversation to keep Sadie from being caught in the middle. It was really great to hear my baby girls voice even if it was just a few short minutes. Sadie said she was excited about going by the music room today to pick up her audition music for her new school play. She loves the stage and acting. I'm really excited for her too! I hope to be able to see her play. I miss the kids. And I want to go home. I can tell this mess is beginning to wear on Kate, as well. I try to be very aware of the kids states of mind but to no avail, I am fighting a very steep and up hill battle. I do not know If I will ever be allowed to ‘go home’. I have no idea what my youngest son is doing. I pray that he is safe, warm and feed. I know he has a good head about himself, he always has had, so I rest assured things are somewhat fine. I think he would call me, if it wasn’t.
Kate and I found a laundry mat, car wash and vacuum within a block of each other in the small town of Pooler, just outside of Savannah. The small town reminded me of the place I used to love to call home. Everyone is so nice. The small community of old buildings still functioning in an everyday life style made our day of cleaning very comfortable. While our laundry was washing, we slipped off to the car wash. The funniest thing I have ever seen was a drive up manual car wash with a drive up manual dog wash center attached. I would expect to see something like this maybe in Alabama or even in Tennessee, but it caught me off guard in Georgia. But hey, these folks are serious about their dogs. I took a picture of it. It tickled me. We finished our cleaning and laundry. It really made a major difference in our attitude. Kate and I actually began to feel a little more acceptable to society. A bath in the sink with clean clothes, and a clean truck to live in, talk about NICE! We will think were staying at the Hilton tonight.
Shortly after we pulled in to park at a parking area, we started to bed down for the evening an older lady pulled in next to us. The parking/camping area here is well illuminated. It is also, private from all the public traffic which gives a false sense of security, but we will take it gladly. The old lady made her bed in the front seat of her tiny little car. She went to sleep. Kate and I found the free-wifi that a McDonald's offered on the parking premises. It really helps when I dont have to hunt for free wifi and spend gas trying to find it. I worked some on my internet sites, while Kate talked with her sweetheart. Later, we watched “the Boys” as we refer to the Ghost Hunters crew...Jason & Grant on our computer, then retired to our Hilton under the stars. Its bitter cold, and we dont have enough blankets to stay warm. As I put the extra blanket over my daughter as she slept so that she would not get sick, I also wondered about the older lady parked next to us. I wondered if she too was cold and/or had enough blankets. I hadn’t heard her start her car to heat it at all so far. The weather is damp and the windows condensate over easily. We are not used to this type of moisture. Now I worry about keeping Kate from getting sick. Kate has asthma and I worry about the effects of the dampness as I lay awake wondering what I am going to do tomorrow. Wish us money as we didn't make any today. Our funds are running low, we are hungry, cold and we need blankets!
NOTE: I didn't make any money today. Our funds are running extremely low. It doesn't take much money to maintain a somewhat sub-standard lifestyle when living out of your vehicle. Its quite economical actually. All it takes is the money for gas, which can be..in our present economical state...pricey and a dollar menu. Kate & I eat, 1 meal a day which is actual food and I usually buy a cup of coffee in the morning. Some stations offers a $2.00 special..a cup of coffee, a bottle of water and a pastry...I drink the coffee and give Kate the water & pastry, some times we splurge and eat two times off a dollar menu in a day. If we have the extra money. We only order one item each, so it will only cost $2.00 and tax for the most part. Getting cold at night and not having the money to feed the gas hog/truck when we are trying to rest is the biggest down fall. The way I see it, if your going to run the vehicles engine to keep warm, then travel/move about. Its more useful than just sitting or at least it seems that way. But somewhere, some time you do have to stop and sleep. Kate and I usually take turns driving and sleeping, but sometimes its nice just to stop moving for a little while. That's when I try to make some money for us, the kids and pay a few of the bills. So far its not been very productive, and I feel that this choice might have been a mistake as well. Everyone is really struggling with the economy. Im seeing the economy crash first hand and its scary, but mostly it very sad and its affecting everyone.
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